The first one, with Elaine, darling bud of May, who also considered this conversation funny enough to post the best part.........
Elaine:no no no..my mind is still stuck on a certain dinner dress im buying later
Me: buying from oshkosh b'gosh? [I tease her all the time about her height....her lack of height]
Elaine: *smirks*thats so passe
Me: guess kids?
Elaine:nowadays kids go for topshop kids
Me: Tell me about it.
Elaine:do NOT laugh. It's a place called "Cat's Whiskers."
Elaine:its a great boutique in bangsar and hartamas. and they have another branch, heh, right smack in front of my office here
Me: dinner dress for.....gandalf coming to visit? [again referring to her as a tiny hobbit]
Elaine:for semi-formal dinners...like the farewell dinners for YE....my dresses and skirts are either too formal (gowns for weddings etc) or too informal
Me: oh ok ok
Elaine:gandalf and i aint talking. he wouldnt let me magically whip up some height
Me: whip? *suggestive smiley*hahahha
Elaine:FIGURE OF SPEECH! SHEESH. the only thing that should be whipped here is you, and i wont be the one doing it
Me:ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! that sounds naughty!!!! so when shall we do it?
Me: saucy hobbit ;)
Me:so lemme get this straight... you're buying a cock tail dress from a pussy hair shop....
........And the second one with Erlend, my Norwegian brother, who was trying to explain to me an outdoor game played with sticks. The gorgeous Liv-Mari explained it to me as "throwing a stick at another stick", and I already had a great time teasing her, and now Erlend attempted to explain his version. Erlend doesn't speak very good English, and I can't speak Norsk for nuts. Hilarity ensues as the game 'kubb' is explained......
erlend says: kubb.. eh.. its a game where u are throwing limer after some other small treethings..
Khai Tzer says: limer?
erlend says: limer=limber
Khai Tzer says: limber?
erlend says: like a big tree
Khai Tzer says: you take a big tree and throw at a little tree?
Khai Tzer says: ?!?!?!
erlend says: lumber
Khai Tzer says: WUAHAHHAHAHAHA
erlend says: it is
Khai Tzer says:is there such a thing!?!??!!?
erlend says: sort of
erlend says: its called kubb
Khai Tzer says: that's the funniest thing i've heard!
erlend says: hehe
Khai Tzer says: but won't the little tree die?
erlend says: its a nice game
erlend says: nah its all ready dead
erlend says: we have chopped it down and uses the same trees year after year
Khai Tzer says: kubb?
Khai Tzer says: what's thte point of the game
Khai Tzer says: ?
erlend says: kubb..?
erlend says: in norvegian it means something like.. ehh .. cant find a good word for it
erlend says: u know when u are burning wood
erlend says: u cut it in small nice peices
erlend says: u got a kubb
Khai Tzer says: ah...
Khai Tzer says: twigs, chippings.....
erlend says: propably
Khai Tzer says: then you throw it at a tree?
Khai Tzer says: to hit a target?
erlend says: u have to try it ones
erlend says: then u will see
Khai Tzer says: do you get points?
Khai Tzer says: how do you keep count?
Khai Tzer says: or do you just throw it at the tree until the tree cries?
erlend says: its a old game from the viking time.. the meaning is to throw down the other teams small trees
Khai Tzer says: so you throw until the trees fall down?
erlend says: nonono
Khai Tzer says: then?
erlend says: its not stuck to the ground
erlend says: when u hit it, it fell over
You can imagine the amount of incredulity and laughter that resulted from this little exchange. Click here to see kubb explained properly.